Design Flaw 101 – Eyes In Back Of Head

Design Flaw 101 – Eyes In Back Of Head

I was in the supermarket the other day when an incident occured to make me marvel at Evolution along with the formation and creation of the human  body.

I mean the design is so practical when you really think about it


Hair on top of the head to protect against the sun. Longer hair on women for babies to hang on to as mum holds them in her arms, balanced on her purposely designed hips built for carrying babies around……..and then look at the eyes..

The eyes are set at the top of the head, so we can see more. I mean just think of how much I would miss of a Nickelback concert four rows back if my eyes were attached to my knee caps…  on one hand, great for peverts who like looking up people’s skirt but not really Kosher for seeing what is going on around oneself.

Now a lot of people may complain about a nose being stuck on their face. it can detract from beauty indeed but then it is very practical little instrument.


It is situated above the mouth, which allows it to smell food before it enters the system as a protection against eating bad or tainted food. A most important part of the human lifecycle indeed.

and notice where your bum is .. a far away from the nose as possible on the back of the body.. that allows us to say to others with a smile.. “well my shit don’t stink’ because it is too far away for the nose to receive vapaour wafts of unwashed flesh and other odorous incendary devices …..and it points downwards too… cos lets face it.. we don’t want to poop on ourselves do we.

So you might say well why not put the bum on your feet, which is even further away from the nose. Well that one is simple… infection…. If we had our bums near the gorund we would be the prey of every ground borne infection this side of ebola. So the bum is really where it is supposed to be.. complete with padding to sit on.

Pubic hair.. well that is an easy one.. It was nicely incorporated as a fly and bitey bug insect repeller. Breasts are grown from the chest area so that the feeding baby will be next to the mother’s heartbeat as it feeds off her. Arms and legs with rounded sockets to allow for more of a swivel motion rather than striaght up and down or sideways.. bum cheeks to allow padding to sit on, toughened skin on the soles of the feet, dextrous hands to hold and grab things and the list goes on.

Overall the human body is a marvel in not only it’s complexity but also in it’s simplicity and practicality of design.

I’d put eyes at the top of the head too, it makes sense to me. The eyes are curved outwards and set near to the sides of the head to allow peripheral vision.

But in the grand scale of the design us human have one major design flaw. It’s something that all of us have realized and wanted at some time of our lives or another and  my experience in the supermarket the other day really hammered that home to me.

I was standing in the aisle perusing the contents of the kitchen gadget section, when a shelf packer stepped backwards from her position, right onto my feet, pushing me into the wall. She excused herself and I took partial blame of the situation and as I explained to her, I had been pretty quiet over the noise she was making, she wouldn’t have HEARD me.


I moved along a little to the disinfectant section and was once again standing perusing the products when bang, crash, I was shoved once again into the shelf as the same shelf packer again walked backwards into me.

She was so apologetic again and I spoke up and said

Hey, it’s ok hun, Unfortunately we weren’t made with eyes in the back of our head”


There you have it my epiphany that struck me as the shelf packer struck me for the second time.

We have no eyes in the back of our head. It is  potentially a fatal design fault that has cost many lives over the centuries.

People just can’t sneak up on you if you have an eye in the back of your head.

To those people who like sticking fingers up behind peoples back, sticking your tongue out or sticking knives in backs..

just won’t happen with eyes in the back of the head…..

We need eyes in the back of our head. How could we have evolved to such a great design without a basic necessary part of our operating system.

Design Flaw 101 Eyes in the back of our head.

Mother’s have lied to children for centuries actually pretending that parents do indeed have “*eyes in the back of our heads*

So isn’t it about time we evolved to actually grow a set?



I think if this shark can grow legs, then I can grow a set of eyes in the back of my head.

I have written to God and to Darwin (covering both bases) outlining my issue with the human body.

Hopefully I will get a reply by return post with an answer inside as to why humans don’t have eyes in the back of our head.
Shark Found With Webbed Feet

Don’t you agree… Won’t you join in my protest for Humans to be given
*eyes in the back of their head*

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